The History of Cynthia: 1989

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In 1989 Make up ads looked like this

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The number one song was Look Away by Chicago.

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And the world lost the beautiful and funny Lucille Ball.

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We have moved 6 years past the eye shadow experience and we are now into 1989.  My memory is a little cloudy about this time but it would have been around this time that I had at least moved from make up to trying on some of my mothers clothes.  It would not have been a large window as I I grew quite fast and in not time was well bigger that my mother.

It was also around this time that I was able to catch shows like Donahue on TV where he had Crossdressers on the show.  I was finally able to have a word to refer to what I was.

There were various other shows at the time that had Crossdressers on them like Sally Jesse Raphael and Joan Rivers.

There were a quite a few events that made me think twice about ever telling anyone about my little secret.  First was a episode of one of the above mentioned shows that really put Crossdressers into a bad light,  the details of which I can’t remember or find a clip for.  It was played out that Crossdressers were deviants who ruined marriages by keeping this terrible secret,  borrowing their wives clothes and generally being perceived as sexual freaks.  To my 15 year old mind this was the end of all things,  how could I ever be happy in life knowing that I would never be able to find any happiness and that if I ever did it would surely fall to pieces if she ever found out.

Another event was in late stages of grade 8.  There was a play going on in school and one of the other boys somehow ended up playing a part as a girl which involved him wearing a dress and make up.  To me this seemed like a perfect thing to do but the whole time the dress rehearsals were going on he was relentlessly by the other boys.  Even though he was not dressing up by choice he was still getting made fun of.  I could only imagine what it would be like if someone ever found out that I dressed up of my own accord.

And the third and final thing I remember about this ear was I had a friend over one Friday afternoon after school and one of the aforementioned shows was on TV with either Crossdressers or Drag Queens.  Back in the day we only had a TV antenna and no cable so we were limited to about 2 stations on a good day.  So seeing as this was really the only thing on I was going to watch it.  I will always remember my friend freaking out about getting sick from watching men in woman’s clothes.  He put up such a fuss about how seeing a man in a dress made him sick to his stomach that I just shut off the TV and tried to find something else to do.  Needless to say that weekend was not much fun at all after hearing your friend tell you that a man in a dress makes him physically ill.

This year was kind of the ending to childhood as after this I would be moving into as I recall some of the worst years in my life.  High School.

Cynthia

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2 thoughts on “The History of Cynthia: 1989

  1. I remember the devastation of outgrowing my mother’s clothes. I also remember seeing the cross-dresser episodes of the Donahue and SJR shows. Like you it was the first time I heard the term ‘cross-dresser”. I was so fascinated by seeing people like me, but couldn’t take watching them with anyone else in the room. It felt like it was obvious I was one of them to everyone around me, so I avoided them unless I was alone.
    Nice post Cynthia, and thanks for the trip down memory lane!
    -ValS

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