Casual Saturday

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So yesterday was a cleaning and chore day,  but I did not wear myself out because I had plans for dressing in the evening.

During breaks between cleaning, I had decided to make a new pair of longer rounded nails for the night.  Recently I had picked up some new Revlon nail polish on sale and other than on my toes I had not used them yet. DSC04903 I made them longer than I normally do but I wanted something a little more fancy for the night.

After finishing all my chores it was around 4 pm and I had my shower and shaved my face.  I was going to do a full face of makeup but just slapped on a coat of Covergirl Colorlicious lipstick inDSC04703 Bombshell pink.  I like how this feels on the lips and the amount of color but it is very staining so if I needed to get it off quickly,  this is not something I would reach for.

I decided that this would be a casual night with trying on some recent hand me downs from the wife.  I pulled on my only pair of Jeans,  a floral embroidered pair from Addition Elle and pulled on the first top which was a short sleeved animal print top from Laura Plus.  It has a gold ring stitched into the center of the neck line that add’s a little pop to it.  I paired it with an Infinity sweater from Addition Elle dsc04918_edited.jpgand tossed on my heels and voila, Casual night in.

I decided to pop into another top I recently picked up which is a black and white sleeveless top with an attached silver chain with plastic crystals.
dsc04927_edited.jpgNormally I would not wear anything that is sleeveless because I do not really want to draw attention to my arms but I was able to pair this with a longer Addition Elle crocheted sweater top.

After getting all dressed I applied my nails and sat back and watched some Netflix and surfed the web.DSC04934

It was a pretty uneventful night which is just the way I like them.

 

Thanks for Reading

Cynthia

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Thing’s I have learned being a Crossdresser: 4 Years Later

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One of my most read blog post’s of all time is Things I have learned being a Crossdresser and as of August 2017 it has reached 1000 views.  I figured seeing as it has reached 1000 a update to the blog with the other things I have learned and where I am today was in order.  I have the original text in black and my new updates in pink.

I have learned so many things in my time as a Cross Dresser.   Dressing up like a woman takes so much skill and patience I am amazed women go through this every day.

1) Clothes

This is the first minefield you should try and cross,  and let me tell you it’s a big one.   Shopping for Men’s clothes is pretty simple as a whole.  Pants, shirt, underwear and socks.  Choose from some of your basic colors like brown, green or blue and you are set.  Women’s clothes on the other hand is a multitude  of colors and fabrics all of which make a completely different look  and statement when worn in the daytime or  night.  I have spent many many hours on the internet looking at clothes and I seem to only have touched the surface of what is out there.

I have expanded my wardrobe over the last 4 years with lots of new stuff that I never thought I would have worn before.  From long dresses, shorter skirts and sheer lace tops.  I was lucky enough to get a female friend that was very helpful in the fashion department.  I would regularly send her pictures of something I wanted to buy and get her opinions of what should or could be matched with the said item.   My best idea now is just to buy stuff that I like and think will be fun to wear.

We also cannot forget the base to any good outfit, The Lingerie.  My Lingerie drawer has expanded with my wardrobe to incorporate many more pieces.  Sometimes you will want to wear a top that has a low collar and you need a lower cut bra that cannot be seen in the collar of the top.

2) Skin care and Make up

Again, another minefield.  I feel that cosmetics as a whole is one of the most confusing things to learn as a Cross Dresser,  clothes can be figured out but to truly learn how to pick the colors that suit you and learn to apply said colors really takes practice.  Make up sections in most stores are fairly big,  at least 4 to 5 isles.  This is where will usually find,  make up,  nail polish and supplies, fragrance and various other beauty tools (brushes, sponges, etc).  I remember the first time I went to purchase some make up with my wife.  I was so nervous the whole time I just pointed at some stuff and did not really pay attention as to what colours I was getting.  Well after my first attempt at using said colours I looked like a clown and not even a funny clown,  more like a horror movie clown.  There are lots of website that give hints and tips for finding the right matches for your skin tone and skin type.  Another good option would be to consult your local stores or salons to see if they are CD friendly and have some help learning.  Most places will give lessons if you buy a specific amount of product.

I wish I would have not used the term “Minefield” once let alone twice,  Oh well.  You live and learn.

I would  like to say that I was awesome at applying my make up,  But I am only slightly better than I was four years ago.  It’s hard to to practise on make up when it’s such a time consuming thing to work on.  There is the shaving,  moisturising and so on and so forth.  I like to have at least a good 2 to 3 hours for a make up practise session because I know at least 3 times I will have to start all over again.

I am still trying to find the right shade of foundation without any luck.  I have spent more on foundation than any other make up product.  I am currently looking into getting a appointment the local MAC store to get matched.  Apparently the store here has a good reputation from the local community but they do not have a private room so I would have my appointment right out in the front of the store,  I am sure I am not ready for that yet.

I have given up on trying to only find “The Right Colours” for me.  Instead I buy whatever colours I want to try and have fun with.  My lipstick and eye colour choices have not gone extreme in any way but I am for sure going for brighter red and pinks and so far they look pretty good.  As far as skin care I am still pretty relaxed about it only paying attention to my skin just before I get ready to apply my make up.

3) Shaving your legs

I am positive every woman is a contortionist with a perfect sense of balance and eyes like a hawk.  I can’t seem to shave my legs without missing a huge area of hair,  not being able to see some areas at all or almost falling over and killing myself.    My wife was nice enough to teach me how to shave my legs years ago.  I say shave but the first time was more like clearing a forest,  and I ran out of hot water in the shower TWICE,  it was well over a hour experience.  Now I only shave in the winter months which is when Cynthia wants to come out more and the fact that I don’t want to tell people why I shave my legs.  I know most people will not believe I am a Olympic swimmer or cyclist.

Practise makes better,  But I am still not perfect.  Once the weather turns cold in early fall I start shaving my legs and that first trim is the hardest part in my opinion and takes the longest amount of time.  It really helps to have a well lit shower and at least the edge of the tub to prop your foot up on.  Remember to use lots of shave gel and a decent razor.  I find it’s best to completely wash and get your hair done,  That way your leg hair will be softer from the hot water and easier to cut.  I get quite a few shaves from my current razor and I am usually shaving my legs at least every 2 to 3 days otherwise I end up with tons of little ingrown hairs..  If you have really coarse leg hair you may need to change your blades more often to prevent razor burn and ingrown hairs.

Since I posted this I also have started shaving my chest in the winter months as well.  There is nothing worse than having a nice lower cut top and passing a mirror and seeing all those chest hairs poking out from a really nice top.  I tried little straps that attached to a bra that would mimic the top of a cami,  they are OK but just not the look I wanted to go for.  So for the first time last winter I shaved my chest and tried to make some cleavage.  Did not go as well as some things I found on the internet but at least it looked better.  The chest area does get super itchy when the little hairs grow back in,  it almost drove me crazy.

4) Your Significant Other

If you are as lucky as me to have a wife or girlfriend who can accept your feminine side you are in a good place.  Also you are in a place to loose many things.  I cannot count how much stuff I have lost to my wife over the years.  Everything from make up to blouses.  Seems she uses it once and it ends up in her regular rotation.

I am so lucky that my Wife puts up with me even after all these years.  I know at times I was very annoying when it came to either talking about dressing or wanting her to take me shopping that I am sure at times she wished the Crossdressing would just go away.  I think I have mellowed over the years and now that I can go out and just buy my own stuff makes it a lot easier on her,  although she does still like a good shopping spree every now and then.

5) Nail Polish

Looks easy doesn’t it?  That is until you try it for yourself.  When you watch a video on Youtube the brush strokes seem oh so easy until you try to replicate it and you end up using more nail polish remover than nail polish.   Similar to make up,  Nail polish requires time to learn how to do it properly.

I gave up on painting my own natural finger nails,  way to much work only to have to take it off either that night or the next morning.  I could never get good with painting my right hand nails with my left hand.  I went and bought large sized acrylic nails and made myself quite a few sets.  The great thing with the fake nails and tip stickers it that the nails can be removed and used over and over again.  It’s also a way easier way to experiment with nail ideas.  The fake nails are fairly easy to cut and shape in any way you want then paint and with the price they will not break the bank doing so.  I did a kinda tutorial that you can read here.

I have learned how to paint my toenails decently well and I tend to keep them painted from fall right back into spring.  I use Nina Ultra Pro nail polish from Sally beauty that has a wider than normal brush.

6) Pantyhose on wet legs

You may as well fight a Polar bear because you have about the same odds at winning that fight as you do getting a pair of pantyhose up damp legs.  It’s damn near impossible to pull them up and at the same time you have to be super careful not to put a run in them or all your hard work just went down the drain.  Take a hint from me wait till you are totally dry or invest in thigh highs.

Still can’t get pantyhose on wet legs,  But I did get pantyhose on with my fake nails already done and didn’t put a run in them so that’s a WIN.

Well that’s all I can think of for now,  I am sure  I will think up some more.

And for those of you that do read my blog till the end I appreciate that you can make it through basically what amounts to ranting on for what seem like forever.

So that’s my 4 years later update.  I got some wins and some things that I still need to work on.  Crossdressing is ever evolving.

Thanks

Cynthia

 

The Venomous sting of Transphoibia

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As I have stated before,  I spent the majority of my childhood living in fear that someone would find out about my Crossdressing.   From all that I had seen and heard, people like me could not have a regular life and were destined to be alone.  There was no internet and no way to connect with others like myself.  It was not until I met my wife that I felt comfortable enough with another person that I expose this side of me.

Fast forward years later and I am now dealing with the other side of the coin to a degree.  My Child recently came out as Genderqueer which really does prove the adage that the apple does not fall far from the tree.  It’s been a learning curve even for me at times making sure I use the name they prefer and using the correct pronouns of “them” and “they”.

 

We were a little worried about telling friends and family,  But for the most part, they have been positive, except one.  I am not going to name which family member this is but it is a close one.  When we first started telling people this person said they were totally okay with the idea and had no problems accepting them.  It was revealed later that they would not use the Child’s preferred name and thought it was stupid to use “them” and “they” as pronouns.  Some other hurtful things were thrown around like how we were hurting the Child in the long run and would cause issues down the road.  This is totally disrespectful to the child and as far as I am concerned way more destructive than us letting them be who they are.

I expected our child to be upset about this but she went beyond sad and straight to rage.  She decided that this person was one they would not waste any time with then if they would not accept them for who they are.  Needless to say,  they have not spent any time with this person for quite awhile now and other than a polite hello says nothing to them at all.

We did not take our child coming out lightly,  we made multiple appointments with Doctors and therapists and made sure we were doing everything we should be at this point.  We were assured that we were doing everything right and could not be doing anymore.  As far as hurting the Child I can tell you this much,  Now that they are out they have flourished more than floundered.  It’s amazing to see how far they have come just in the last few months.  We are so proud that they felt safe enough with us that it was no problem to tell us.  I don’t understand people that disown their children because of gender or sexuality.  As a parent, it’s your duty to raise your Child not decide who they are.

We will be having more appointments soon and are slowly deciding on which direction they would like to take at this time.  I will keep you all posted on what happens.

Thanks for reading my vent

Cynthia

Cynthia’s Lingerie Drawer: Ashley Graham Midnight Bodysuit with Geometric Lace by Addition Elle

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midnight_bodysuit

So here I am again post something from Addition Elle. You may ask yourself why does Cynthia post so much stuff from this same place, well because they are Canadian owned, have a brick and mortar store in my area and have an unofficial open door policy regarding trans people.  Makes for a great combination for me and a place I will surely spend my money.

I have lusted over this piece for about 5 months or so now, just ask my wife because I am sure she was tired of me showing this to her every time it went on sale.  I have never owned a body suit before and I really wanted this one.

The Ashley Graham collection DSC04129from Addition Elle is always a little sexier and provocative than the regular Deesse collection and always has something in the collection I love. I must say though the AG collection is priced well higher than the standard. A standard Deesse bra will run you $55.00 to $62.00 and panties will cost about $25.00. Ashley Graham bra will cost you $65.00 to $70.00 and the panties are $30.00. As far as I can tell all Addition Elle bras and panties are made with the same quality but you are paying for the AG name.  The regular price of this was $95.00 CDN but I picked it up on sale for $25.00.

The website list the Bodysuit as

“Unleash your inner vixen in this extravagant plus size bodysuit from the Ashley Graham collection with plunging neckline, choker clips, and peekaboo keyhole for the ultimate mix of glamour, sensuality and temptation. Features shaping mesh panels, sexy removable garters and graphic lace for a finished effect that is sexy and captivating.”

I was drawn to this piece both by the color and the fact that it has garter straps on it, I love the look of garter straps. So after watching it on the website and it went on sale again I decided it was time to get it and I would call it an early Birthday present to myself.

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The overall construction of this piece is not unlike a bra,

the cups are underwired and there is a triple hook clasp in the back for added support. The crotch area is set up with 3 small buttonlike closures to be able to open and close. All the extra parts like the choker and garter straps are detachable via small silver hooks.

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Another option this Bodysuit has is the small hook on the left shoulder strap allowing it to be converted into a racerback style as well.

 

I was a little hesitant to purchase this because the only size the store had left was 3X and 4X. I knew 4 was too big and looking at the sizing chart 3 would be fine on the top but I was not sure about the bottom as I normally wear a 16 or just X.

This would have been a great article to try on first before purchasing, seems the 3X fits perfect on the top but the area around the legs seems to have some extra fabric left over.  I would love to have tried on a 2X to see what the difference in sizing would be. It’s not a deal breaker for me as the length seems just about perfect.  I have lots of room so it does not look like it’s hanging off me but it’s also somewhat taught like it’s supposed to look.

It feels comfortable to wear and my only real complaint is the back garter straps are a little hard to do up and could have been made to get a little longer for ease of use.  But as far as my first foray into bodysuits I think this one is a definite win.

 

 

When I was younger I suffered from Crossdressing.

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I originally made this as my background for my Twitter account @Cynthia_0102 and decided I should make another one and post it up here.

It pretty much in not so many words sums up how I feel about the places I have come to with my Crossdressing.  Granted I may not embrace it to the point where I feel as if I can go out but I have at least come to a peace with it within myself to where I can just be me.

Cynthia

Hello 2017

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I had planned on putting this posting out on Monday the 2nd of January,  as you can see I got a little behind.  Well better late than never.

Well, we made it,  Yet another trip around the sun and here were are fresh and new in 2017.  I hope all my Readers and Friends had a great New Years Eve.  Mine was slow paced and I didn’t even make it to midnight but that’s okay it was still fun enough.  I was able to dress and just hang around the house with some movies and snacks and have a laid back easy night.

I did take some pictures and tweeted them through the night but I figured I would post them all here as well for my first blog post of 2017.

So I had planned to start getting ready Friday night after work (Shower and shave legs) but that did not pan out at all,  after spending the day outside in the cold I was exhausted.  Normally I can make it from 4 to 10 pm but Friday night I had to take a nap from 5 to 7 just to be able to get back on my feet.  After waking up I was still somewhat tired so decided against doing anything more than painting my toenails and pulling all my stuff out of storage.

dsc03774After finding all my boxes I was at least partially ready to get things going for Saturday night.

The box on the Very top is all my makeup and the one below that is all Lingerie.  The box on the right of that is stockings, pantyhose and where I keep my forms.  The big green box is all clothes plus there were about 2 more bags from summer sales that I still have not had time to put away in the box.  I should really clean that box out because I know there is some at the bottom that I never wear anymore.   It would be great if there was enough closet space to hang all this up but alas there is not.

The box on the floor at left is nail polish and on the right is more stuff like deodorant, facial cleansers and moisturizer.

Saturday morning I was slow getting going and was out of bed at around 7 am.  Coffee was a must and after about 4 or so cups I was ready to go.  I decided I needed a nice new set of nails for the night so I set about making up a set.  I decided to do something other than the squared oval that I have been doing.

I have searched before online to try and find dsc03783some type of guide to nail shaping but is seems most times they are done the nails are already attached to the person before they are cut and filed into the profile wanted.  It was easier said than done but I was able to measure the length I wanted and then use a circle template to roughly mark out the rounded shape I wanted.  I then cut the excess off and finished off with some custom nail files I had made that have more grit for taking off material faster.  I was pretty happy with how the shaping turned out and decided to go with a color that up until that point I had not used called Glistening Plum that I used on my toes Friday night.  dsc03805

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I was really happy with how these turned out and extremely happy with this color.  If the lights hit these just the right way they almost look metallic like in the top photo.

So after finishing the nails and getting a little bit ofdsc03799 cleaning and some laundry done it was close to about 2 in the afternoon so it was off to the shower with some of my favorite stuff to really start to get ready.  I love to take my time when having a shower,  there is nothing worse than being rushed and missing a ton of hairs on your leg.  I have been using the Gillette Venus Swirl razor for over a year now and out of all that I have tried I really like it the best.  My only complaint here is with the Shave Gel,  I can’t say I am really crazy about the smell but overall is decent to use.  The original type I used does not seem to be made anymore,  I am a little sad over that.

After taking my time in the shower it was still only about a quarter after 3 and I was so excited for the new nails that I just had to get them on right away,  this was a bad idea.

The nails take me anywhere from 15 to 20 minutes to apply.  Getting all the adhesive strips on then removing the second part and then finally applying the nail all takes time and patience as to not screw things up.  As I was sitting there admiring my new beautiful nails I realized I was not dressed yet or had my make up on.  I was not about to take them off because even though I have lots of the adhesive strips they no longer sell them at the beauty store so what I have left has to last me.  This was going to be a real challenge.

Now I sometimes have a hard time doing my bra strap up as it is because I prefer to do it up from the back which I hear is less wear and tear on the garment than doing it up from the front and then spinning it around.  I had to fiddle with it but was pretty happy with myself after finishing the last of the 4 clasps.  Now came the pantyhose.  I have a hard time with pantyhose on the best of days,  my hands are so rough that even my skin can snag on them and make it almost impossible to get on let alone with new long nails that I am still getting used to wearing.  After some fidgeting, swear words and some close calls I was now again one step closer.

Now makeup……..This again was going to be a little bit of a task seeing as now I was having a hard time opening up my compacts and cases to get the products I needed to use.  Foundation was easy but the eye shadow cases seemed to be a bit of an issue but I perceived and even though it was not one of my best jobs the face was done.

dsc03812_editedFor my first outfit, I decided to go with a short sleeve lace dress I had picked up from Penningtons in late December before Christmas.  It seemed like a festive little number.  I paired the dress with a black cover-up that my wife had recently given
me and I thought it finished the look off pretty welldsc03811_edited

 

Of course, you can’t stick with just one outfit all night,  so it was time to change.

 

 

 

My second pick for the night was a lace pencil skirt from Penningtons and a lace 2 piece top from Addition Elle.  Looking back at the pictures now I am thinking it was maybe a little too much lace but it was fun to wear for the rest of the night.

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When 10 pm rolled around I was dead on my feet so I packed it in for the night and headed to bed.  On Sunday I still had some time to kill do I decided to paint my natural nails which is something I don’t get very much chance to do.  When it was all said and done they did not meet my expectations and the pictures I tried to take did not turn out at all so needless to say I was not really happy,  but it was practice.

So that was my New Years Weekend,  nothing too exciting but it was fun for me.

What did you do?

Thanks for reading

Cynthia

Cynthia’s 2016 in Review

 

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Another year is almost at a close and this year has brought some new things for Myself.  Just thought before the year was over I would review some of these things.

Telling the Kid

I had posted it before here about my child telling us that they identify as non-binary or gender fluid.  We do not use She or He but instead use Them and They.  We have joined a local group for parents of Transgender Children which is kinda weird going to because of my own Crossdressing.

The wife and I decided that we should tell the Child because it may help her knowing that she was not the only one in her family who at one point had similar issues.  It seemed to go okay with he just saying that’s cool.  I did get some questions like do you own dresses, do you have bra’s and so on and so forth.

We got them a appointment with a counselor about the gender stuff and other issues she was.  We made it clear to her she was able to talk about anything she wanted and it came to light that she had wished we had never told her.  This is a evolving situation and for the most part I have backed off saying anything about.  The one good thing that came from the situation though is now I don’t have to hide my painted toe nails anymore.

I had a huge blog post planned for this but seeing as the situation is still ongoing I will wait and then give you the full story.

Buying Stuff

It was a few years ago now that I finally was able to shop for stuff by myself.  I started by picking up small stuff at the drug store, Razors, Panty hose and the likes and then finally moved up to clothes.  My first trip to Addition Elle by myself I am sure I was 10 shades of red more than normal.  With my list in hand and my cover story of it was for my wife I picked up my first few items.  I was floating higher than a kite after that trip and that fully opened the door.

Now I have no issues walking into either Addition Elle of Penningtons (My 2 favorite stores) and just grabbing whatever I want and heading to the cash.  In my opinion the best invention for a Crossdresser shopping has been the cell phone.  I am able to open the web page and just ask the sales associate if this is in stock,  makes the purchase way easier.

But up to this point I have still not ventured to purchase my current enemy,  MAKE UP.  That was until about 3 months ago.  I am still having a ongoing battle with finding the right shade of foundation to use and to this point I still am.  While scanning the local drug store chain flyer I found the product I wanted was on sale but only for 2 days this being day one.  So next day off to the drug store which at the time was pretty busy and made me a bit nervous but I went on.  I had to make sure the aisle was clear before I entered and made my way down to the Foundations.  Just like every time I go to buy make up the shelves look like a tornado had hit and nothing was where it was supposed to be and I had to search almost every bottle to find the color I was looking for.  I found them and headed picked up a couple other small things and headed for the cash.  The line was not long and I ended up at the cashier pretty quickly.  I put my stuff on the counter and put the foundation out last,  as she grabbed each item and scanned them through.  I was sure I would get a second look as she rang through the foundation but her head never looked up from her task as she placed the foundations in the bag and I was met with no odd looks just the obligatory “Will that be cash or credit”.

Another mission  crossed off the list and since then I have been back and bought more without still finding the right color.  Seems I am doomed to look patchy and off color forever.

I am still not comfortable with letting most people know about this side of me but I am to the point where I am not going to let the fear I felt for so long stop me from doing what I want to anymore.

Overall and 2017

Other than all the other things that went on in the world 2016 was not a bad year for me.  My little space here on the internet turned 3 years old and I am still amazed myself that I have kept it up this long.

I still have a ton of stuff I can do for Cynthia’s Lingerie Drawer it’s just a matter of having time to sit down and write them.

And to all my readers have a safe and Happy New Years and here’s to seeing and reading all your blogs in the future.

Thanks for reading

Cynthia